A New Life
I gave birth to my 5th child almost 3 years ago. I was a very difficult pregnancy and around 30 weeks I stated to show signs of what they thought was preeclampsia. Although I spilled tons of.protein in my urine it didnt match with my mostly stable blood pressures. I gave birth at 36 weeks to a 5lb 10oz beautiful baby girl that I call Zoey (life). Four days after birth I had my first heart attack. Soon after discovering my arteries where as open as a faucet thry performance an echo and my diagnosis was made. It crushed me beyond belief and I lived everyday in a haze. I was sent home with a life vest and hope for recovery in 3 months. After 3 months I still had the life vest and no recovery followed. I begged my cardiologist for more time and praying d I woukd be different from what I read, I would be among the percent of women who regained heart function but to my dismay I had to have an internal pacemaker/difibrilator implanted 5 months after delivery. I collected disability and lived in a state of depression for months to follow. I finally decided that I would live like im living instead of living like I am dying. Since then my heart gave out on me once in October 2013, but not since then. I am working again and went back to nursing school. I am proud of what I have accomplished since my diagnosis but my everyday is not without struggle. My EF was 23% greater or less than 5 so I pic greater than. I am very short of breath a lot of the time hiever I think.I know my limits. I have been keeping my internal grief all to myself for the past 3 years and I have a difficult time sharing.